This is a question that we get often. Many women are terrified of sharing the details of their recurring bacterial vaginosis infection with their partner and are sacred that they would leave them, blame them, or not be supportive.
We’d like to start by saying that you 100% matter and that having recurring bacterial vaginosis does not define you or makes you unworthy of a healthy and supportive relationship. While having recurring bacterial vaginosis may seem like a relationship obstacle, it can also be viewed as a way to test the strength of your relationship and prove for yourself if your partner is here for the long term!
We gathered what we believe is the best way to tell your partner about you having and dealing with recurring bacterial vaginosis:
It’s important to understand that unfortunately, most people do not know what bacterial vaginosis is and how common it is. You may know this already, but BV is affecting a tremendous amount of women! 30% of women will experience BV in their lifetime, and antibiotics treatment will not work for 50% of them. An estimated number of almost 22 Million women in the United States get bacterial vaginosis every single year.
The reason bacterial vaginosis is not really talked about, is because it’s still somewhat of a taboo subject that put us in an uncomfortable and vulnerable position. In comparison, yeast infections and UTIs are talked about more and are not as big of a deal as BV, it seems.
Step number 1 is to tell your partner what bacterial vaginosis is and how common it is. You can direct your partner to the CDC website to read about it. You can also show him subreddit and Facebook groups that talk about recurring BV. It will help to validate the magnitude of the issue by reading other women’s stories.
Step number 2 is to try to explain to your partner what it feels like to have recurring bacterial vaginosis and what you are doing to try and resolve it. A great analogy is to compare bacterial vaginosis to a strep throat. A strep throat is a well-known bacterial infection that makes you irritated, swollen, uncomfortable, and you need an antibiotic treatment to clear it (sounds pretty familiar, right?). Ask your partner how he/she would feel if they got strep throat in the same frequency you get BV (monthly, weekly, bi-monthly, etc). This way, your partner will be able to somewhat understand what you are going through and how frustrating it is! This is a good time to tell your partner you are getting treated for your recurring bacterial vaginosis and are actively looking for remedies and solutions to stop your recurring BV.
Step number 3 is to tell your partner what you need from him/her for your healing journey. You might consider things like changing your birth control, ask a male partner to use a condom as sperm can increase your pH level, make some diet changes and start to cook more, etc. Your partner should definitely show signs of being supportive and helpful at this stage. He/she should be attentive to your needs and make you feel loved and supported!
If you feel like your partner needs a few days to process this new information, give him/her the required space and try to bring up the subject again when you feel like he/she is ready to keep talking about it. Having recurring bacterial vaginosis is not a life sentence to your relationship and/or dating life. You will come out of it stronger than ever and once you figure out what helped you heal the infection, you’ll want to help other women who are struggling with BV as well.
If you have a female partner – please know that BV can be passed back and forth between female partners and that many women have BV without any of the symptoms. Please ask your female partner to get checked and possibly treated so you can stop the contagious cycle.
Here at V-Luxe we created daily probiotics that are specifically formulated to help women who are struggling with recurring bacterial vaginosis. Our daily women’s probiotics are high potency, include prebiotics (food for the good bacteria), and we only include good bacteria strains that have proven results to help women with stopping BV. More than that, the good bacteria strains that we use can survive your stomach acid and extreme weather (so they can colonize in your body successfully and give you all the benefits!). Our probiotics work by producing lactic acid, the acid that keeps your vaginal pH level between 3.5 - 4.5 and prevents bad bacteria and yeast overgrowth. This is how we help women prevent bacterial vaginosis.